So far away from home

I'm sitting on the floor in my bathroom with the laptop while kaelyn takes a bath. Someone's diaper was far too much for any amount of wipes to handle. So bubbles toys will distract from the head to toe scrubbing she just got. (we aren't a fan of having our hair rinsed and can't yet discern why mommy wants us to look UP when the big blue cup is over our head. )

Anyways, after a fun filled day of church and superbowl, friends and festivities, I woke up today feeling sick. HOMESICK. I see all the pics of people back home, my mom and my sisters and can't help but feel that they all grow closer by the day to each other while I am 2 1/2 hours away from home raising the start of our family and living our "married lives" together.I know it was our choice to live here and don't get me wrong, I love my home and my husband and Kaelyn and Odin. But there comes a time when you wish you could just pop over to hang out with family for the afternoon. Do lunch, drop Kaelyn off so i can get a haircut in peace. Instead a weekend usually is required for any family function because we have to drive 2 1/2 hours to get there! Then the dog whines in our ears 1/2 the way home, Kaelyn wakes up hungry, I haven't breast fed in well over 3 hours and the night we get there is a total wash. Saturdays are booked up with seeing all of our family in one day so nobody feels left out and sunday is the reverse of friday. back up to go home and then tackle the laundry from the weekend, calm Kaelyn down from all of t he excitement.

It probably would be better if I weren't a social hermit. After all, I am blogging from the bathroom on a Monday morning. Can't really go too far in the truck since it has horrible mileage and Jeremy has the car at work with him 30 minutes in the OTHER direction of the mall. I never was the best at making friends. and the ones from high school have either A) changed too much and we drifted apart or lost touch..... or B) we are close but in different states so a lunch date or hanging out at the movies is impossible. There have been friends I've made up here, but besides mutual friends, I've got Jeremy and he works and then Jen and she works 5:30 am to 2pm then takes HER little girl home to stick to their routine. And the other one I attempted to befriend, well lets just say that my husbands job "all that money" made me a bitch, my miscarriage turned me into a pity party and I was using it for attention (or some such non-sense) and I gave birth to a "F*$%ing ugly baby" so she really isn't anybody I would spend ANY time with, much less let a negative influence around Kaelyn. Ugh. I guess it's like i live in a vacuum. If there were a mommy group in the area maybe I'd get to branch out and socialize, but there's not. so its pretty pointless in hoping. As much as I'd hate to leave Jen and Donnie and our goddaughter, someday I'd love to move back home, but knowing my luck, by then everyone would have changed more and i'd be right back where i started. OY. lol Anyways, i'm sure kaelyn's hiney has more wrinkles than a california raisin so I'm gonna log off and hope that if anybody reads this, they have a good day. Embrace and love your friends and family. So you dont feel so POOPY and jealous when facebook pictures make you homesick.

All of our love (and appologies for being debbie downers)

Lara and Kaelyn